Everything May Be Forgivable, But Everything Is Not Excusable

I keep coming back to the tectonic shifts in societal thinking because it keeps creeping under my skin. Here comes another post where my deep love for my fellow humans is bound to be interpreted as a judgemental rant by those who think we should be nice to even the most insidious and immoral among us. So be it.

Here is an article by a mom who was in a supermarket with her child. The little guy, the author's son, has Down syndrome. A cashier sees the boy in the stroller and "[spits], in a poison whisper," these inexcusable words:

“I bet you wish you had known before he came out. You know they have a test for that now…”

The test she is referring to, of course, is amniocentesis and/or a triple screen blood test, which were offered to my wife and me with our two sons and which we turned down because we would never have aborted because of a chance of Down syndrome. (The results of the blood test, by the way, are not even 100% reliable, so there is a chance of aborting a "normal" child, too.)

No Free Passes for Jerks

Everyone gets angry; everyone gets overwhelmed; everyone faces occasionally unfair challenge levels; everyone gets ill. These are intermittent states of just about any human life. 

But, have you noticed that, while we all face the issues listed above, some people seem to see those conditions as a license to treat others poorly? 

For some reason, I have never really functioned that way. I'm not saying that I have never been snippy on a bad day, only that I don't make it a habit, the way I see others do. If I do snap, I am well aware and I am usually apologetic for it. And, no matter how bad things are going, I can still manage to say hello and give even the slightest smile of greeting to people whose fault it is not that I am in a funk. 

I'm not sure what else to say about this, other than it seems to be egocentrism of the worst kind. If someone is angry with me for something I have done, okay. But what makes people think they can mouth off to someone else because of unrelated problems? 

I even hear people defend those who do this: "Well, she's very busy and overwhelmed, right now..." I don't think I will accept that. The quotation was not "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you, unless, of course, there is a fly in your yogurt that day."

There are people enduring chemotherapy who have a smile for everyone they see. A backlog of unread emails and a coffee stain on a favorite tie doesn't give anyone the right to throw a stapler at the innocent guy in the next cubicle. 

Intensifying the Already Awesome: Why?

Original Paget illustration

Sherlock Holmes, on the current BBC series, Sherlock, is a "high-functioning sociopath." (He has said this several times throughout the series.) I love the show, but, as a repeated reader of the old Holmes tales, I can tell you that there is no indication of his being quite a sociopath. He is a genius, for sure. He is quirky. He has issues, including an addiction (one that was common in the era). But, of course, in order to make something work with a modern audience, the writers "amped" thing up. Also, the comfortable, often teasing relationship he had with Watson in the stories has become an intense, almost inexplicably strong near-obsession with the good doctor and his well-being.* (Spoiler alert: Holmes blows someone's brains out at point-blank rage in order to protect Watson's wife's reputation.)

Does story, today, need to be so intense in order to work? The Holmes stories have remained somewhat popular in their original state, so, it makes me wonder if we're not stoking a fire that is already burning plenty high.

Rathbone and Bruce (Watson as a dolt)

Every ad or promoted post on Facebook is billed as "shocking" or "hilarious." "Extreme" has been the catchword, in advertising, for everything from particular sports to snack chips for more than a decade, now.

A few years ago, McDonald's even went so far as to refer to a "decadent drizzle" of chocolate on their sundaes. ("Uh, yes, I'll have the Frozen Oxymoron Treat...")

I was watching the season finale of The Biggest Loser a few weeks ago. I vowed I would actually go back and count them, and didn't, but, the host of the show and the contestants must have uttered the word "amazing" four times a minute. (I don't mean this to be hyperbole: I really think that must have been the case; it was live -- this is what happens, I suppose.) "You look...amazing... What was it like living on the ranch?" "It was...amazing...I learned so many amazing things and Dolvette was...amazing."