Friday, September 6, 2013

Safety Beyond the Interwebs?

In some ways, I guess I am a rube.

This morning, I heard a report on the radio about a big company (I forget which one) that is "asking the question" as to whether there is "any way in the world" to protect its data from hacking. The fact that they have to ask this question seems spooky to me. It seems like the mass-thought has settled into total acceptance of the status quo. 

For the modest price of, say, ten million dollars, I would like to offer this company advice -- a way to prevent data from being hacked. I'll trust them to send a check the moment they see this. Here it is:

Take it off-line. Eschew the Internet.

You are most welcome, big company with a hacking problem.

I'd rather worry about cat burglars in Ninja suits trying to get into my building past gray-headed security guards, under lasers and booby traps, and breaking into file cabinets, than about some shadowy, unshaven nerd with his bellybutton popping out under the rim of his Futurama T-shirt hacking into my system and destroying everything with the push of a button and a sip at the Slurpee cup...

Impossible you say? The world runs on the Internet, you say?

Is it really, truly impossible? Companies used to run without the Internet. Is it impossible or just insanely difficult? Are we just accepting "the way it is" or are we really bound tightly by the electronic leash?

One thing I know, though, is if my stuff isn't plugged into a wall or connected wirelessly, ain't no one hacking into it. No how. Not unless they come in to my house, which I would strongly discourage.

There just must be a way to run business without the Interwebs. Or maybe not. I'm very tired.

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